I HATE Dating

nodating

Oh how I miss being in a relationship. I miss getting dropped off at work and thinking about him picking me up at 5pm. I miss just laying on the couch talking about my day. I miss cooking for him and watching him devour it. I miss how sex was magical , we would stare into each other eyes and get lost in our  rhythm. Shit, I even miss our dumb ass arguments,that I would never let up on, until I was right and he agreed. With that being said…. I FUCKING HATE DATING.

I’m so awkward when it comes to dating. I learned that there’s no grey areas in dating when it comes to me. I’m either in a serious relationship or we are fucking. I don’t  know how to date nor do I know the rules. Like, when do you know when it’s exclusive? Should, I see him 3 times a week or 4? Can  I meet his mom? Can, I go to a wedding with him as his plus one?  See fucking is easy, there’s isn’t attachments nor strings.  I’m over that as well, but a girl gotta get her rocks off somehow.

I’m 31 now, I don’t just want sex, I want my relationship back. Well not with the same guy clearly that didn’t workout. ( it was him not me lol). Yea that’s what we all try to convince ourselves , it’s easier to move on when you blame others.

Who really likes dating?

I mean for men it means they have to spend money, lie about shit they really don’t enjoy, dating someone that may not be interested in them and may end up wasting their time with Ms. Wrong or Ms.Hungry.  As for women we have to start all over, get comfortable again, risk our vulnerability , and hear many lies. Now I’m not saying dating always happens this way but most of the time it does. Men, will ask you what you like to do for fun , just so they can mold themselves into your dream guy. Some men are genuine and some are just out to get some ass. This is the risk we have to take while dating. Love is a risk , that’s worth taking and dating is a part of that risk.

I have been on so many dates , some were fun , some pointless, some lasted longer than others. But Clearly none worked out, I’m still single.

Again I absolutely hate dating.

Dating is like a never ending story. You’re doing the same thing over and over again but with different people. It’s fucking exhausting . At times I feel like I’m having an an out-of-body experience right in the middle of dinner. You know within the first few minutes of a date if you like the person or not. I so  just want to  walk away right at that very moment but that’s just mean. Then I end up just sitting there nodding my head and smiling like I’m interested.

Thank God for text messaging, because if I don’t want to see you again , I can just text you “ I’m just not looking for anything serious”.

 

I’m over here blabbering on and on about how much I hate dating, like people actually dating during this millennial era. Social media has a tendency to make people less social.Guys now hit you up in your inbox, DM or snap you. It takes a lot of excitement out of dating when someone  already follows you on Facebook, IG or snapchat. It’s like they know what most of your family members look like, what you’re into and how you dress. It sucks because they’re expecting to meet the person you are on social media . Which doesn’t tell everything about you. I had a guy inbox me for a date and had the nerve to ask me if I could dress the way I do on IG. I’m like are you fucking serious.

People don’t even date anymore , it’s like we have a few text conversations and now you’re asking me to come over. Netflix and chill ya ass the fuck home. I’m not cooking for you , we are not sitting on my couch and no we’re not going to a fucking bar. You want to date me, either meet me at the restaurant or pick me up from my door. Who the fuck gave you the right to change the game of dating. I want to put on makeup, a elegant dress and shoes. I want you to open my door , play nice music on our way to dinner and have an intellectual conversation. And if you think I’m using you for a free meal( first off, I’m a independent black woman lol) , trust this dress, shoes, hair and makeup took time and wasn’t free. So if this doesn’t work out were both wasting our time. Or maybe not , maybe it’s a great date but by the end of the night we realizes this ain’t it. But if you think you’re going to hit me in my DM for some ass you have the wrong one.

 

This is one of the reason why we end up settling with our ex, going back to the rebound , or just saying fuck men all together. Because when dating goes wrong it’s so easy to run back to what you’re comfortable with. I’m not saying it’s right but it happens. I know being lonely sucks ass but it comes to the point and time where you just have to deal with it head on. It comes to the point where you have to learn to be by yourself, enjoy your own company and know your worth. Don’t settle because you are afraid to be alone. I rather be by myself then in a situations that I’m miserable in. Every time you go back you are digging a deeper hole to get out of.

 

Being single doesn’t mean that you know nothing about love, Sometimes, being solo is wiser than being in a false relationship.—Unknown.

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5 thoughts on “I HATE Dating

  1. I love the blog and I’m currently in the dating phase and I hate it soooo much. I rather be in a relationship, but I guess dating is like test driving a car. You have to test drive them until you find the right one.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dating doesn’t suck but the people you choose to date probably do. I mean how can you not enjoy dinner at that new restaurant you’ve been wanting to try or that new lounge in that old part of town that’s now the place to be. Dating is the fun part of getting to know someone; or not. You know you’ve got the representative not the real person so you get to rep yourself anyway you want to. Hey it’s just a date not a commitment. Have fun with it or stay the fuck home alone and complain. Look dating gives you something to talk about with your friends. You’re a much more interesting person when you date. I try not to hurt feelings or be rude but if I’m bored on a date, I politely excuse myself and leave. Fuck it. I don’t waste time or money. If you’re giving me the one-word answers or not laughing at my light hearted humor then fuck you. I’m out. I pay my own way and drive my own car so no harm no foul. I laugh about it on the way home, lose your number and talk about your ass at work on Monday.

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    1. I want to say it sounds like you may need a hug. LOL! Don’t take the post personal I’m not speaking about you. And when I say I hate dating I hate the concept of the end because I rather be in a relationship that’s what I meant. Please don’t take what I say out of context.

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  3. In 2017, i gave up on dating. I felt like to were to many disingenuous people. They were not being authentic to themselves. Goals and intentions are being masked for free dates and something to do on a friday night. The climate for good individuals in the dating world is very murky. We will be targeted, bamboozled, lied to, hoodwinked, and stripped of things that make up our genuine nature. At first, i thought it was a Philly thing. Such is not the case. Its everywhere. People like the idea of dating but not the context of what dating ensues. In 2018, i will come back into the market with a new perspective, gameplan, and recruiting methods. My ruth exists and I damn sure will find her.

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    1. Yes, reason why I miss your input! Very authentic!!!

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